The Perpetual Healing Garden - SweetSue's Joyful Return

[SweetSue]

On the idea of healing, my daughter and I had an interesting conversation last night about how her mother's gone a little crazy since her father died. She explained it in such simple terms that it was like a cold glass of water in my face. She opened her arms as wide as she could and said "This is your energy. This is how you come at the world - full on, no holds barred. That's a bit much for the rest of us."

Then she gathered her arms in to where they could have enfolded me in a gentle loving embrace. "Dad pulled your energy into a controllable space, where you could operate in safety and peace, do your loving thing and not drive the rest of us crazy."

Gosh, the gir's insightful. It caused me to sit back and review my actions in my real life and on the pages of this site and decide change was in order. I've been blessed to have people in my life who'd rather see me evolve than dispose of me, and one of those kind souls led me to Thich Nhat Hanh, and I've been lost in his teachings about mindful breathing all day. I'll be staying there for a while as I sort this out.

Change is good. This is one of those major transformative moments fraught with trepidation and angst until I decided such response is worthless and decided to just practice mindful breathing and stay in the moment already. This may take a while. LOL!

 

[SweetSue]

Sadly, no. I turned off the light this morning. :surrender:

Awww..... It was the seed. You have better ones coming.

 

[SweetSue]

Daily Update: Day 42 & 44

I'm sure there's probably some little thing I could do in the garden, but I wasn't at all motivated to wander from personal reflection and meditation, so I stayed out of everyone's way this morning.

The photo girls are plodding along, with that tiny Fantasmo Express looking a little more interesting.

She looks so small next to them.

I'll be happier as they rise up and fill out, but things are actually looking pretty good in there.

The CBD Critical Cure's side branches are almost where I want them. In case I didn't make it plain, I'm waiting to top until I feel the plant has reached a point where it's vigorous enough that topping won't effect it in the slightest and the side branches are ready to rise up to a level canopy.

Critical Mass is going to make her own surge any day here. Gosh, what a hearty specimen!!

The Auto Jack Herer and Med GOM 1.0 have no complaints. That AJH is a sleepy one in the morning. I'll have to post a photo of her later in the day so you can see she doesn't stay like this.

No time like the present. Much better.

Dark Devil Auto (Day 42)

I did do something. I replaced the two cool light bulbs that were in the reflector in front of the Dark Devil with 2700K spectrum bulbs. That still leaves 2 of the CFLs as 5000K, but the other four are now geared to flowering.

I'm going back to my personal growth session now. Thanks for stopping by. While you're out and about, remember to smile with the eyes. It's hard not to radiate joy when you smile with the eyes.

 

[Radogast]

Thich Nhat Hanh, from 3 people who have taken multi-day classes with him, is the real deal. He's not the only one with the teachings, but is at least 37 times deeper than Deepok.

Nice change in the Criticals.

 

[NastyAce05]

On the idea of healing, my daughter and I had an interesting conversation last night about how her mother's gone a little crazy since her father died. She explained it in such simple terms that it was like a cold glass of water in my face. She opened her arms as wide as she could and said "This is your energy. This is how you come at the world - full on, no holds barred. That's a bit much for the rest of us."

Then she gathered her arms in to where they could have enfolded me in a gentle loving embrace. "Dad pulled your energy into a controllable space, where you could operate in safety and peace, do your loving thing and not drive the rest of us crazy."

Gosh, the gir's insightful. It caused me to sit back and review my actions in my real life and on the pages of this site and decide change was in order. I've been blessed to have people in my life who'd rather see me evolve than dispose of me, and one of those kind souls led me to Thich Nhat Hanh, and I've been lost in his teachings about mindful breathing all day. I'll be staying there for a while as I sort this out.

Change is good. This is one of those major transformative moments fraught with trepidation and angst until I decided such response is worthless and decided to just practice mindful breathing and stay in the moment already. This may take a while. LOL!

Daily Update: Day 42 & 44

I'm sure there's probably some little thing I could do in the garden, but I wasn't at all motivated to wander from personal reflection and meditation, so I stayed out of everyone's way this morning.

The photo girls are plodding along, with that tiny Fantasmo Express looking a little more interesting.

She looks so small next to them.

I'll be happier as they rise up and fill out, but things are actually looking pretty good in there.

The CBD Critical Cure's side branches are almost where I want them. In case I didn't make it plain, I'm waiting to top until I feel the plant has reached a point where it's vigorous enough that topping won't effect it in the slightest and the side branches are ready to rise up to a level canopy.

Critical Mass is going to make her own surge any day here. Gosh, what a hearty specimen!!

The Auto Jack Herer and Med GOM 1.0 have no complaints. That AJH is a sleepy one in the morning. I'll have to post a photo of her later in the day so you can see she doesn't stay like this.

No time like the present. Much better.

Dark Devil Auto (Day 42)

I did do something. I replaced the two cool light bulbs that were in the reflector in front of the Dark Devil with 2700K spectrum bulbs. That still leaves 2 of the CFLs as 5000K, but the other four are now geared to flowering.

I'm going back to my personal growth session now. Thanks for stopping by. While you're out and about, remember to smile with the eyes. It's hard not to radiate joy when you smile with the eyes.

What your baby did made me tear a lil bit a mellow but happy tear ... her words hit me in the chest! tell her thank you for me!!
and your ladies are beautiful also been reading since page 90 had to join in if you don't mind!!!

 

[SweetSue]

What your baby did made me tear a lil bit a mellow but happy tear ... her words hit me in the chest! tell her thank you for me!!
and your ladies are beautiful also been reading since page 90 had to join in if you don't mind!!!

Thank you NastyAce05. My baby was sitting here visiting when I found your message and she said "you're welcome".

to the journal. I have no objection to your joining us. Make yourself at home and jump right into the conversation any time.

 

[SweetSue]

WE HAVE PURPLE!!!!!

 

[ShiggityFlip]

Looks awesome like drops of ink spreading out on the leaves.

 

[SweetSue]

Looks awesome like drops of ink spreading out on the leaves.

I'm sooo excited Shiggity! I knew there was a possibility that it could be a plain Jane. I'm so much happier with purple.

 

[Barliman]

All aboard! Great news Sue.

 

[welshpony]

Yay thats awesome

 

[SweetSue]

All aboard! Great news Sue.

Yay thats awesome

Thanks guys. *giggle* I keep going over to look

 

[SweetSue]

Daily Update: Day 43 & 45

Time for another look at the garden.

I started the day's gardening with a TransWater drench for the CBD Critical Cure. Nice of her to keep perfectly on schedule. It's been exactly five days. Good girl.

Back in the tent. The light got raised an inch or two.

I raised the Fantasmo Express to be level with her companions.

The auto tent. I'm brewing a malted barley grain SST for the autos. Still another hour to go on that. Raised the lights in here too, but after I shifted the plants to place the Auto Jack Herer under the 3x100 unit. I'm happier with that.

'

My lovely Dark Devil Auto (Day 43) is now 18" from the light and no safe way yet to raise it up any higher. She's gonna have to deal with it. I'll have to solve this before the next plant. I've a couple ideas.

Ahhhh........ Purple. *contented sigh*

Tomorrow's pictures will show any reaction to the SST applied today. I never remember to note the changes that occur. I'm really as laissez faire about gardening as I was with parenting, I'm afraid.

Back to the project at hand.

I plan to launch my research thread tomorrow, chasing down everything I think I need to know about CCO and how we use it. Lots of biology and Pharmacokenetics involved. Mere weeks ago I didn't know the field of Pharmacokenetics even existed, and now the word rolls off my tongue. Today I'm trying to pin down the intro into something concise. I'll be around now and then. You guys are my favorite distraction.

It's a beautiful day out there. I hear the labyrinth calling, and maybe an early dinner along the river. Sounds like a plan. As soon as I get the drenches done on the LOS pots. I'm assuming you've already been busy spreading joy at every opportunity? Good.

 

[SweetSue]

I just realized its 3:00. I've done my Callanetics session, meditated, had a decent meal, done most of the gardening chores, and haven't yet done a wake 'n bake. How does this happen? Gosh I'll be glad to get brownies back. I don't even think about it at all with brownies. Without I suddenly hit a point where I'm wondering why I don't feel normal.

 

[Amadeus Forzin]

Happy Saturday Sue

 

[SlowToke]

I plan to launch my research thread tomorrow, chasing down everything I think I need to know about CCO and how we use it. Lots of biology and Pharmacokenetics involved. Mere weeks ago I didn't know the field of Pharmacokenetics even existed, and now the word rolls off my tongue. Today I'm trying to pin down the intro into something concise. I'll be around now and then. You guys are my favorite distraction.

Your plants are looking great, Sue!

And I'm really excited about your new thread. Can't wait for the launch!

 

[SweetSue]

My daughter informed me that she doesn't think she'll be able to try the oil until it's legal in our state. Her concern is that if for some reason she'd run out after being on it and realizing what normal life is like she's not certain that she wouldn't choose suicide rather than live without it at that point. She knows that she can stave off suicidal thoughts on her current meds. That minuscule chance is blown way out of proportion in her brain. She's also concerned about having to inform her medical team about the oil. Not something she's comfortable with doing.

Prohibition sucks big time. The girl's breaking my heart. This was our best hope for some kind of normal life for her. I almost wish this on the members of my state legislature. Maybe then they'd see the error of their unthinkable behavior.

I'm gonna take a walk along the river and calm myself, go out to dinner, then come home and decide what I want to grow for me. I already know there's a Strawberry Blue and a Carnival in the next planting. I'll decide how many more I think I can plant and get the seeds dropped this evening.

I'm heartbroken guys. I have no leverage against this.

 

[SweetSue]

Happy Saturday Sue

Happy Saturday Mr Am4zin.

Have a splendid holiday.

 

[Noob4x4grow]

There's always the west coast, my dear.

 

[Canyon]

Sue,

Is it possible that your daughter does not want to try cannabis as a treatment? Guidance and support helps, however her body and mind are her own. She has to chose what to do.

From your post, it sounds like she has turned the corner with her problems. She is opening up about how she feels. Listen to her. Treat it as part of her healing. This choice is about her.

Sincere best, it is a tough one.
canyon