I love me a nice cold cup of orange juice...
but why does it have to remind me of every damn hang over I’ve ever had!
but why does it have to remind me of every damn hang over I’ve ever had!
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My daughter moved out on her own the other day, and she calls me periodically to ask me for advice and answers..
I kind of thought her watching me raise her would have proven that I’m winging it, but for some reason, she thinks that I know things?
When I ask my wife if she wants help, she constantly changes the subject, and asks me if a bear shits in the woods?
like I’m some sort of bear scientist or something..
Turning on you’re lights and sirens after losing a drag race is just poor sportsmanship!
I have a horrible sleeping disorder,
where I have to wake up every morning to go to work!..
A human fart can be louder then a trombone.
I discovered this at my daughter’s Christmas concert..
Happy thanksgiving day everyone!!
RIP Boiled water!
you will be mist!
please don’t delete me!
everyone told Sam not to sing!
but Samsung anyways!
I smoked a blunt,
And was minding my own business at my cousins wedding...
I saw this guy dancing, and wasn’t sure if it was the blunt I just smoked, but I had to say something, I just couldn’t let it be.
So I said to him, All you’re dance moves looks like you’re trying to tell the guy on first base, to steal for second base...
my cousin comes up to me as he’s staring at me, and says,
“Leave the groom alone”
According to the Mac and cheese box..
I’m a family of four!
I was lonely so I glued a coffee cup to the top of my car...
now everyone waves at me!!
We’re thinking of you @Cola Monster hope for a speedy recovery sir!!!
Not sure where you come up with this stuff but keep it coming. I like a good laugh.
I was smoking a blunt and it dawned on me..
When you do squats, are you’re knees supposed to sound like a goat chewing on an aluminum can stuffed with celery..?
@West Hippie hope you and the Misses is doing well!!
Instead of presents, this year I’m giving everyone my opinion.
Get excited!
Cool cool cool!! My seeds are out for delivery!! @Patient puffer yours shouldn’t be too far behind!!
Saaaaaweeeeet!! My new seeds have made it into Canada!!
It’ll be like Christmas time Once they get here!! -
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