2046 : Chimp vs. Sativa

You know it's ridiculous to expect a lot out of a $29.95 office chair but damn the seat should at least stay on. Lucky I didn't get impaled if you know what I mean. Oh well they could have just thrown a chain around my neck and towed me to the hospital the chair's got wheels. :)
I'm so damn sick of cheaply made products. I dare anybody to pick up a 12 pack of soda pop by the cardboard handle and swing their arm around in a windmill. Man I could stand on the cardboard beer cases they had when I was a young chimp..... :(
 
Glad to hear you weren't on the news with the chair having to be removed from you know where. $30 dont go anywhere near as far today as it used to be.
the beer case were made very well back in the day so you could return your empties and get your dollar back. now they just stuff everything in South Ohio Tumble weeds:(
PotChimp said:
You know it's ridiculous to expect a lot out of a $29.95 office chair but damn the seat should at least stay on. Lucky I didn't get impaled if you know what I mean. Oh well they could have just thrown a chain around my neck and towed me to the hospital the chair's got wheels. :)
I'm so damn sick of cheaply made products. I dare anybody to pick up a 12 pack of soda pop by the cardboard handle and swing their arm around in a windmill. Man I could stand on the cardboard beer cases they had when I was a young chimp..... :(
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PotChimp said:
Good chair but didn't pay nothin'? Not your house? Wow, I know who you are now! And dammit, if you were allowed to serve a third term I'd vote for you again!!!!! :)
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Hahahahaha nã man, i just live with my parents :)
 
Happy Tokesday Chimpster:)
 
Did I ever tell you about the bear in the bar?
 
PotChimp said:
Is that the one where the bear asks the rabbit "Does $hit stick to your fur?", the rabbit says "No", and the bear wipes his a$$ with the rabbit?
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Good weednesday PC:)
No but thats a classic:)
A Big Black Bear walks in to a bar in Billings Montana. the Bear bellies up to the bar and slams his paw on the bar. He growls at the Bartender to bring him a beer. The Bartender walks down the bar and tells the Bear that "we don't serve Bears beers in Billings, its against the law".
Well this angers the Bear and he again requests a beer. the Bartender repeats what he has just said.
Now the Bear gets real angry and says "Do you see that woman at the end of the bar? If you dont serve me a beer I'm going to eat her!"
The Bartender replies "sorry we can't and wont sell beer to Big Black Bears in Billings Montana!"
So the bear goes to the end of the bar and does just what he said he would. he devours the woman at the end of the bar and returns to his bar stool slams his paw on the bar and says"Now Give me a beer!" The Bartender tells the bear "Nope we dont serve Big Black Bears beer and especially Bears that are doing drugs!"
The Bear gets a puzzled look and ask "what drugs? I dont do drugs!"
the bartender replies..... Wait for it ..."well thats a Barbitchyouate":thedoubletake::rofl:
 
fish cake said:
Good weednesday PC:)
No but thats a classic:)
A Big Black Bear walks in to a bar in Billings Montana. the Bear bellies up to the bar and slams his paw on the bar. He growls at the Bartender to bring him a beer. The Bartender walks down the bar and tells the Bear that "we don't serve Bears beers in Billings, its against the law".
Well this angers the Bear and he again requests a beer. the Bartender repeats what he has just said.
Now the Bear gets real angry and says "Do you see that woman at the end of the bar? If you dont serve me a beer I'm going to eat her!"
The Bartender replies "sorry we can't and wont sell beer to Big Black Bears in Billings Montana!"
So the bear goes to the end of the bar and does just what he said he would. he devours the woman at the end of the bar and returns to his bar stool slams his paw on the bar and says"Now Give me a beer!" The Bartender tells the bear "Nope we dont serve Big Black Bears beer and especially Bears that are doing drugs!"
The Bear gets a puzzled look and ask "what drugs? I dont do drugs!"
the bartender replies..... Wait for it ..."well thats a Barbitchyouate":thedoubletake::rofl:
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I gave Mr.Chimp reps saying "Hahaha Classic" and you are saying the same, funny hehe :)

Ps: HUAHUAHUAHUAHUAHUAHUAHUAHUA :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:
 
Listen to this one:An atheist was walking through the woods one day in Alaska, admiring all that evolution had created. “What majestic trees! What a powerful river! What beautiful animals!” he said to himself. As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. Turning to look, he saw a 13-foot Kodiak brown bear beginning to charge towards him. He ran as fast as he could down the path. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was rapidly closing on him. Somehow, he ran even faster, so scared that tears came to his eyes. He looked again and the bear was even closer. His heart pounding in his chest, he tried to run faster yet. But alas, he tripped and fell to the ground. As he rolled over to pick himself up, the bear was right over him, reaching for him with its left paw and raising its right paw to strike him.

“OH MY GOD! …”

Time stopped.

The bear froze.

The forest was silent.

Even the river stopped moving …

As a brilliant light shone upon the man, a thunderous voice came from all around…

“YOU DENY MY EXISTENCE FOR ALL THESE YEARS, TEACH OTHERS THAT I DON’T EXIST AND EVEN CREDIT CREATION TO SOME COSMIC ACCIDENT. DO YOU EXPECT ME TO HELP YOU OUT OF THIS PREDICAMENT? AM I TO COUNT YOU AS A BELIEVER?”

Difficult as it was, the atheist looked directly into the light and said, “It would be hypocritical to ask to be a Christian after all these years, but perhaps you could make the bear a Christian?”

“VERY WELL.” Said God.

The light went out.

The river ran.

The sounds of the forest resumed.

… and the bear dropped down on his knees, brought both paws together, bowed his head and spoke: “Lord, thank you for this food which I am about to receive.”
 
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