I don’t.He hasn't returned my messages.
I'm concerned.
Anyone know how to get ahold of him?
Stay safe
Bill284
DIY SIPs Duterte's Nightmare - Mystery S. Asia Sativa - Zkittlz, Runtz, OG UV, God's Gift, GG#4, 1st Grow In 20yrs
- Thread starter ReservoirDog
- Start date
Hope he's ok. Haven't heard from him in a couple of weeks.
If your referring to Buds Buddy, I have a mailing address for him. I once sent him a prize I won and didn't have a use for.
Actually we're looking for @ReservoirDog . Buds lost his wife last week and will resurface when he's ready.
But we haven't heard from ResDog in close to a month.
Any chance you have contact info for him?
...we haven't heard from ResDog in close to a month.
That I do not.
Ok, thanks. He has some health issues and has disappeared for stretches before but never for this long.
Good evening Azi,
I was going to say something but.
I'll pm you instead.
Stay safe
Bill284
- Thread starter
- #267
ReservoirDog
Well-Known Member
Oh my God, Buds... I'm so sorry for this loss of yours. Grief is the most difficult emotion I've ever experienced and it is profound. I desperately hope you are surrounded by loved and liked ones right now. I'm so sorry for your pain.
So, hi everyone. I'm also so sorry for disappearing and causing concern. I did peck out a quick message here weeks ago simply to say, weakly, that I might take a short break, but now that I return to the open tab I realize that it's still sitting there, written but unpublished. Classic ReservoirDog move, what a (#$ %$#* %&#%. It's not funny, and I'm so sorry for not paying close enough attention to this responsibility to ensure that I properly notify you guys. Really, I am.
Indeed, some terrible things have happened; Initially, it was another quick hospitalization, then, on my discharge day I was subject to a completely random, very intense and damaging physical assault by strangers after picking up a new prescription at a new pharmacy.
I am both grateful and relieved this happened only to me, not my friends or family and that's the only solace I take from it. However, because I didn't properly notify anyone here, this will have impacted a few of you in the form of concern and anxiety as a result of your core decency and humble but meaningful friendship, and that upsets and bothers me a great deal. I believe we all have very similar obligations, to friends, family or virtual pals, obligations that my '420 ghosting', though accidental and accompanied by extenuating circumstances, still seriously transgressed.
I'm not going to go into great detail right now. I'm just not able. Just imagine a mugging with a beat down, knives brandished, and wounds sustained.
In this instance, it's clear that my body will heal somewhat faster than my mind. I've experienced violent physical contact before, but having it forced on you in this way, by a pair of freaky-randos, well, it does an awful lot of damage upstairs, or at least, it did to me. I started some group therapy recently to deal with what happened but it is very challenging with memory so fresh.
@Buds Buddy , I am so sorry for your loss. I dearly hope you have the love and support you need and deserve right now. Thinking of you.
So, hi everyone. I'm also so sorry for disappearing and causing concern. I did peck out a quick message here weeks ago simply to say, weakly, that I might take a short break, but now that I return to the open tab I realize that it's still sitting there, written but unpublished. Classic ReservoirDog move, what a (#$ %$#* %&#%. It's not funny, and I'm so sorry for not paying close enough attention to this responsibility to ensure that I properly notify you guys. Really, I am.
Indeed, some terrible things have happened; Initially, it was another quick hospitalization, then, on my discharge day I was subject to a completely random, very intense and damaging physical assault by strangers after picking up a new prescription at a new pharmacy.
I am both grateful and relieved this happened only to me, not my friends or family and that's the only solace I take from it. However, because I didn't properly notify anyone here, this will have impacted a few of you in the form of concern and anxiety as a result of your core decency and humble but meaningful friendship, and that upsets and bothers me a great deal. I believe we all have very similar obligations, to friends, family or virtual pals, obligations that my '420 ghosting', though accidental and accompanied by extenuating circumstances, still seriously transgressed.
I'm not going to go into great detail right now. I'm just not able. Just imagine a mugging with a beat down, knives brandished, and wounds sustained.
In this instance, it's clear that my body will heal somewhat faster than my mind. I've experienced violent physical contact before, but having it forced on you in this way, by a pair of freaky-randos, well, it does an awful lot of damage upstairs, or at least, it did to me. I started some group therapy recently to deal with what happened but it is very challenging with memory so fresh.
@Buds Buddy , I am so sorry for your loss. I dearly hope you have the love and support you need and deserve right now. Thinking of you.
Sorry to hear of your issues. I'm sure there's a better word there but it escapes me at the moment. The outcome could have been worse. It may take time for the physical and mental wounds to heal, but at least that's better than the other potential outcome. I don't really understand all the violence and hatred in the world anymore. Where did the world skew into this alternate reality. It's like Back To The Future II. Biff stole the Sports Almanac and now we're all screwed. I've worked in Emergency Services the last 13 years and the frequency and severity of incidents that were maybe once a week at best are now nightly occurrences. Wishing you a speedy recovery.
Love ya buddy, just glad your ok.
Heal, be well.
Try and enjoy Xmas.
And give your mum a big hug from me.
Talk when your up to it.
#VIVOSUN #Love What You Grow
Bill284
cbdhemp808
Well-Known Member
Good to have you back @ReservoirDog and I'm very sorry to hear you were attacked. Damn. It seems the world has taken a hellish turn in so many ways, in these times. But I also sense, and feel hope, that things are now turning for the better. What can we do? Make our best effort to keep shinging the light. That's all we can do. And take care of ourselves – take care of our loved ones, our families, and take care of our health. I wish you a speedy recovery, brother. 
Glad you're back, RD. Sorry to hear of you journey, but hopefully things turn quickly for you now.
Danishoes21
Well-Known Member
Hope you are good RD, keep it tight brother.
Merry Christmas RD. 
Hope your ok buddy.
#VIVOSUN #Love What You Grow
Bill284
Hope your ok buddy.
#VIVOSUN #Love What You Grow
Bill284
- Thread starter
- #274
ReservoirDog
Well-Known Member
Thank you for your concern, good people. It's true, I'm basically unable to join the workforce anymore and I'm still in my 40's. My training and experience is mostly in journalism and captaining passenger vessels, tugboats, and ferries. Weird combo for weird times. Weirder now, mind you, because there's something wrong (that can't be fixed) with my inner ear and I'm basically seasick, on land, 50-100% of the time. Ironic, I know. It's been building slowly since '04.
I've also been a long-time migraine sufferer and it's gotten quite bad the last few years.
You know, I don't usually get caught off guard by things as predictable as, 'the seasons' but I did this year. Really what happened is that I perceived the deeply dark nature of my present and future existence for the first time - in any kind of depth - this winter. It's not pretty. When my folks pass, anytime in the next 10 years, I will be nearly alone with no partner, siblings or friends. I have a daughter in her early 20s but she's not doing so well herself, from my perspective. It's wonderful to have that one person of course, but from a psychological perspective, she's also the one other person in the world for whom I feel total personal responsibility and yet I am totally powerless to assist her, materially.
Anyway, that's what's what with me, unfortunately. Actually, a contributing factor, aside from my constant terror of falling down and braining myself, this winter, was that I had an injury take place. In fact, I was assaulted in the street by a couple of junkies, a fact that in and of itself I find very depressing. I hate telling you that this happened to me, concerned for what you'll think of me. But I was just walking by on my weekly trip to the pharmacy and the 2 guys jumped me and took the package I had. I struggled and broke 6 ribs for the trouble. Now, finally, two months later it doesn't hurt to breathe (that's a lie), but I'm not so sure my mind has healed yet because everything has been severely darkened by the event. Normally such a thing would not affect me like this but I think because everything else is so difficult it somehow took on the straw-on-camelback strategic-level importance to my psyche.
I'll suppose I'll wear this page of the thread like a scar, proud to receive and grateful for your kindness, but wince when I recall its cause. Cheers, good people.
I've also been a long-time migraine sufferer and it's gotten quite bad the last few years.
You know, I don't usually get caught off guard by things as predictable as, 'the seasons' but I did this year. Really what happened is that I perceived the deeply dark nature of my present and future existence for the first time - in any kind of depth - this winter. It's not pretty. When my folks pass, anytime in the next 10 years, I will be nearly alone with no partner, siblings or friends. I have a daughter in her early 20s but she's not doing so well herself, from my perspective. It's wonderful to have that one person of course, but from a psychological perspective, she's also the one other person in the world for whom I feel total personal responsibility and yet I am totally powerless to assist her, materially.
Anyway, that's what's what with me, unfortunately. Actually, a contributing factor, aside from my constant terror of falling down and braining myself, this winter, was that I had an injury take place. In fact, I was assaulted in the street by a couple of junkies, a fact that in and of itself I find very depressing. I hate telling you that this happened to me, concerned for what you'll think of me. But I was just walking by on my weekly trip to the pharmacy and the 2 guys jumped me and took the package I had. I struggled and broke 6 ribs for the trouble. Now, finally, two months later it doesn't hurt to breathe (that's a lie), but I'm not so sure my mind has healed yet because everything has been severely darkened by the event. Normally such a thing would not affect me like this but I think because everything else is so difficult it somehow took on the straw-on-camelback strategic-level importance to my psyche.
I'll suppose I'll wear this page of the thread like a scar, proud to receive and grateful for your kindness, but wince when I recall its cause. Cheers, good people.
Good morning my friend.
Hopefully you find talking about your past issues brings relief instead of stress.
My fire safety thread and all the support helped me a lot.
Discussing it instead of watching the game film in my head over and over helped get rid of it.
No one here would ever judge you for being mugged or anything else for that matter.
Your such a wonderful soul we have nothing but admiration for your heart and strength.
I hope Karma gets it's butt in gear soon
you deserve happiness and health and I wish you plenty of both.Take care of yourself.
#VIVOSUN #Love What You Grow
Bill284
Hey Dog, nice place you have here! You and I have some things in common. Love of growing weed. Weed. Debilitating migraines, backpacking, love of the sea.
Anyway I've enjoyed perusing your journal very much lately! Stay strong bro!
Anyway I've enjoyed perusing your journal very much lately! Stay strong bro!
Wishing you the best @ReservoirDog. I wish I had some words of wisdom that would help with your funk, but I do not. My wife suffers from clinical depression and several physical maladies so I understand your plight, as much as someone who isn't afflicted can.
- Thread starter
- #279
ReservoirDog
Well-Known Member
Not to sound too snowflake-like, but it turns out that merely identifying yourself as someone who gives a fuck about someone else, someone thousands of miles away in a different country, someone you've never met, is in fact a significant contribution that I'm pleased to tell you has had a larger, measurably positive, impact than I expected it might. Thank you.
I really didn't want to talk about myself, but I knew that isolation can be, well, deadly in these situations, and so, out of 100% self-interest, I posted about my feelings and physical reality. I knew there was potential for something positive to result, eventually, but I didn't anticipate that people's responses would actually, immediately, reach into my heart to create a modest but consistent improvement right away. I hope that makes some sense (not sure it does).
I really want to recognize you for the support you give your wife. Of course, I have no idea what your lives are like, but the brief statements you made about your wife tell a massive story that fellow sufferers and their spouses, their "caretakers" all understand. It is exceptionally difficult to be the caretaker, and their devotion belongs in that category we reserve for the noblest of human behaviours.
It's pretty clear you'll be ushered through the gates of Valhalla when you pass on FarSide, and it will be well deserved.
Thank you.
If it helped in any way, I'm glad.
My mother suffered from a Bi-Polar disorder from age 43 on. She was perfectly normal (whatever that means) until she took a bad spill off her horse. She broke 8 ribs, cracked a 9th, broken scapula, and punctured a lung. She spent 3 weeks in the hospital. She was home for a week before we had to take her back to be committed. Was in the psych unit for another 3 weeks. So can physical trauma trigger mental or emotional issues? In my book, yes.
When I first met my wife I told her that if she ever had any mental health issues, I was out. After all the years of dealing with my mother, I didn't know if I could go through that anymore. When my wife had her breakdown, she was reluctant to get help because of my previous statement. We discussed her condition and I told her I'd stay by her side and apologized for my previous words. I drove her to the in-patient mental facility for an evaluation. For someone that can come across as cold and unemotional, I was in tears when she was telling the councilor that she was considering suicide. She was admitted and I went home. For the next 3 days I suffered from anxiety, didn't eat, barely slept, and just paced back and forth on the front porch smoking cigarettes. Her words just kept echoing in my head and I couldn't imagine being without her. It's been 15 years now, she still fights depression but not to that breaking point.
It will still be a toss up. I did some pretty terrible shit in my younger years.