Merry Christmas!
A brief Introduction:
Long time lurker and a few posts in different threads. I just started transferring my offline journal online and will be caught up in a week or two. It's my first auto, but hardly my first grow. I've grown hundreds, if not over a thousand, plants beginning more than three and a half decades ago. And I've helped others grow far more than that. I was part of a group that developed growing and breeding techniques, as well as general knowledge, that I believe can be applied to autos and plan to test. In the process, I want to share that knowledge.
You see, I came and read many auto threads, looking for info. And there was much there to help me plan my grow. But there also seems to be some missing as well as some misunderstandings about growing cannabis. I nearly laughed out loud when I read that there was a time it was thought that autos could not be topped. Then sobered up as I realized that this was generally thought to be a good idea, instead of something to use where necessary...
Over the next couple of weeks I'll tell you what learned and how it can be applied to autos. I hope you'll find some useful info here as I have found much on this site. And I'll try to keep it it interesting and fun, if not always politically correct.
In some of my posts you may see a reference to 'Ernie'. Ernie is a composite character. When we would meet, in order to avoid embarrassing anyone by their mistakes, suggestions, etc., they would be attributed to 'Ernie'. Bonus points for the first person to correctly identify why we chose 'Ernie'.
For this first one one, we'll cover a light-hearted entry to wonderful world of weed growing, circa mid-1980's. This is not verbatim the lecture we would give to a wannabe grower, but it's damn close. [I'll cover the paranoia of the times later, but we generally spoke of hypotheticals. Still, you'll notice how nothing incriminating would be said in this manner...]
Imagine the following being delivered in a round-robin fashion, from between 3 and 10 people, usually in a Denny's at around 2 or 3 AM...
Cannabis is a weed. That's why we call it weed. It's easy to grow and hard to kill, you follow? You have to try to kill it.
Weed dies easy. Seems you look at it wrong and it it's dead. You have to take real good care of it.
Sound contradictory? It isn't. Weed is very easy to grow. IF you have a little understanding about plants.
And about their needs. And the growing method you're using.
The problem is, most new growers don't have a clue. They throw some seeds into dirt, often with a plant already there.
Then they put it on a windowsill or under a lightbulb and give it water, when they remember, usually too much. And say that weed is just too hard to grow.
[At this point we would explain about lighting requirements, soil options, watering and fertilizer. Since this is out of date for the most part, I'll leave that out. And now for the part I mentioned that may appear to be non-PC...]
Weed understands us, because it's the same; it's got girls and boys.
Boys got balls and girls spread their legs, that's how you tell them apart.
Gotta get rid of the boys.
Yep! The hornier the girl, the higher she'll get you.
If she gets laid, all she'll care about is the kids.
That means growing seeds.
Yeah, She'll still get you high. But she would have been better if she had stayed horny.
We know what you're thinking: What if I just cut the dudes balls off? We all thought that.
Many, probably most, tried it. It ain't worth it.
Guys are useless. Not even if you want kids. And they barely get you buzzed.
So take them out, quickly and permanently. And give all your love and attention to the girls.
Yeah, to the girls.
...
You get idea. We found that this stuck with beginners better than any other method we tried. Doesn't mean there isn't better, just that we did not find it at the time.
Cheers from the darkside
A brief Introduction:
Long time lurker and a few posts in different threads. I just started transferring my offline journal online and will be caught up in a week or two. It's my first auto, but hardly my first grow. I've grown hundreds, if not over a thousand, plants beginning more than three and a half decades ago. And I've helped others grow far more than that. I was part of a group that developed growing and breeding techniques, as well as general knowledge, that I believe can be applied to autos and plan to test. In the process, I want to share that knowledge.
You see, I came and read many auto threads, looking for info. And there was much there to help me plan my grow. But there also seems to be some missing as well as some misunderstandings about growing cannabis. I nearly laughed out loud when I read that there was a time it was thought that autos could not be topped. Then sobered up as I realized that this was generally thought to be a good idea, instead of something to use where necessary...
Over the next couple of weeks I'll tell you what learned and how it can be applied to autos. I hope you'll find some useful info here as I have found much on this site. And I'll try to keep it it interesting and fun, if not always politically correct.
In some of my posts you may see a reference to 'Ernie'. Ernie is a composite character. When we would meet, in order to avoid embarrassing anyone by their mistakes, suggestions, etc., they would be attributed to 'Ernie'. Bonus points for the first person to correctly identify why we chose 'Ernie'.
For this first one one, we'll cover a light-hearted entry to wonderful world of weed growing, circa mid-1980's. This is not verbatim the lecture we would give to a wannabe grower, but it's damn close. [I'll cover the paranoia of the times later, but we generally spoke of hypotheticals. Still, you'll notice how nothing incriminating would be said in this manner...]
Imagine the following being delivered in a round-robin fashion, from between 3 and 10 people, usually in a Denny's at around 2 or 3 AM...
Cannabis is a weed. That's why we call it weed. It's easy to grow and hard to kill, you follow? You have to try to kill it.
Weed dies easy. Seems you look at it wrong and it it's dead. You have to take real good care of it.
Sound contradictory? It isn't. Weed is very easy to grow. IF you have a little understanding about plants.
And about their needs. And the growing method you're using.
The problem is, most new growers don't have a clue. They throw some seeds into dirt, often with a plant already there.
Then they put it on a windowsill or under a lightbulb and give it water, when they remember, usually too much. And say that weed is just too hard to grow.
[At this point we would explain about lighting requirements, soil options, watering and fertilizer. Since this is out of date for the most part, I'll leave that out. And now for the part I mentioned that may appear to be non-PC...]
Weed understands us, because it's the same; it's got girls and boys.
Boys got balls and girls spread their legs, that's how you tell them apart.
Gotta get rid of the boys.
Yep! The hornier the girl, the higher she'll get you.
If she gets laid, all she'll care about is the kids.
That means growing seeds.
Yeah, She'll still get you high. But she would have been better if she had stayed horny.
We know what you're thinking: What if I just cut the dudes balls off? We all thought that.
Many, probably most, tried it. It ain't worth it.
Guys are useless. Not even if you want kids. And they barely get you buzzed.
So take them out, quickly and permanently. And give all your love and attention to the girls.
Yeah, to the girls.
...
You get idea. We found that this stuck with beginners better than any other method we tried. Doesn't mean there isn't better, just that we did not find it at the time.
Cheers from the darkside