In regard to what I wrote earlier today, I guess it doesn't help the fact that I was shot 2 times in the back, I think carrying a gun every where is not the way to live life. Marijuana has shown me this. I have been smoking for about 7 years. I started smoking at 14 and then at 18 I was shot. The reason for that is, My ex-girlfriend was cheating on me and I found and came home from work early one day(I was tipped off that he was there)and they were in my bed fucking....I got really pissed off to the point that I blacked out right before I reached for my gun and got shot twice. I didn't even know he had a gun. After he shot me I guess the inital shock of the bullets hitting me "woke" me and I shot him one time. Ever since then I have trusted nobody. My own wife say's I treat her like "one of them people". That means people that I don't know or trust, I refer to them as them people. I have been living like this for quite some time. I have been on zanax to try to calm myself and it doesn't do anything. Even the Totem poles do nothing. The only thing that has ever taken any affect on me is yes I cannabis. Not only does it help me, it brings me to the point of not caring about it. I have been leaving my gun at home a lot more in the past 3 months meaning, I leave it in the truck. SO thats me.......thank you for reading
